I feel it there. Have you ever felt like something is just… circling you? The world seems heavy. Life seems chaotic. Everywhere you turn seems to hold a looming pressure or fear. It’s not always loud, but it’s always there. It feels suffocating. It’s not just in our imagination. 1 Peter 5:8 “Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.”.

The enemy is real. He watches for the weak moments. He studies you and waits patiently. Even Satan knows Scripture. He uses deception, half truths, and lies to destroy and deceive us. His primary goal is to “steal, kill, and destroy”, John 10:10. Now, I do think we give him too much credit. The mountain of laundry probably isn’t the enemy, it’s most likely life and consequences. Not to say he can’t use that too, but sometimes life happens or our free will gets the best of us and allllll of a sudden, we want to blame the enemy. But we would be naive to ignore the fact that we DO have an enemy…

And when you love Jesus or seek change or grow closer to God or have a heart of repentance… the enemy gets scared. He comes for you. If the enemy isn’t after you, you are not a threat and that should concern you.

Have you ever really looked at how a lion hunts? They isolate. They wait for weakness. They go after the distracted or wounded. That sounds all too familiar, doesn’t it. When we mess up or feel overwhelmed or weak, we isolate. It’s literally the exact opposite of what we are supposed to do. We remove ourselves from our support and accountability (if you’ve done it right) and then try to take it upon ourselves to fix it or make ourselves worthy enough again. News flash… we CAN’T. The enemy targets our insecurities or exhaustion. He whispers lies that sound like our own thoughts. We then wonder why life is so heavy or why our relationships are so messy or why we find ourselves feeling beat down and empty. We feel lost and far away.

We sheep have to stay close to our Shepherd. The one who helps guard us. To the voice of truth and grace. When our eyes are on Jesus and we stay close to Him, the enemy can’t pick us off that easily. See, if we understood that there was a lion outside of our front door, we’d become really quick to put on our armor. We’d be in our word (the sword). We’d look desperately for a savior who is bigger and more powerful than the enemy.

That doesn’t mean we constantly stand looking for the enemy. Being paranoid is a GREAT way to guarantee the enemy holds your attention without him actually having to work for it. Our eyes need to always be fixed on the King. We need to learn the truth and carry it with us. We need to pray for discernment and take our thoughts captive. Recognize things for what they are and act accordingly.

But also, offer yourself grace. Know that no matter how far you’ve wandered or how lost you feel, The Good Shepherd is always coming after you. He leaves the 99 to come and find you. You can call upon His name and He comes running like the father to the prodigal son. He may not change the circumstances but He will change your heart and show you goodness. The enemy doesn’t just take a break and life doesn’t just change to magically be free from anything hard, we change. We just have a peace and a joy bigger than it all, knowing who sits on the throne.

My honey and I feel stuck. We have things that have to get done and things that limit our ability to get things done. His hours have been ridiculously long for over 2 months now. We need to get new tires on his car. My car decided to have an issue with the auxiliary battery the day before we were supposed to switch. The kids have multiple things we need to be at, but my body is failing. I see him just long enough to be sad he is gone so often or to tell him all of the problems we have going on and it gets really easy to attack him instead of the problem WITH him. The DISHES. Dishes are my weak spot as a house wife and so is Mt. Clean Laundry. My husband I have been really consistent in praying together and inviting the kids to come with us. In spite of the heartache, we have actually pressed in to Jesus. I also called my mom in tears two weeks ago feeling like I couldn’t go on with this pace anymore when the words “I feel like staying with you for a week would both help make things easier and maybe make my husband wake up”. News flash, my husband was already awake and also exhausted. Thankfully she spoke life and truth over things and recognized the attack for what it was. I am married to a selfless man who loves me and our kids with his whole heart. We are his second and third only to God. This man lays down his life for us day after day like Christ did for the church. Yet here I was, grumbling and divisive and selfish. There was weakness and exhaustion, and the enemy saw it. I yelled at my kids one day last week. They had been arguing all day and whining and just doing silly kid things. The tv was 2 notches too loud and we were late for THEIR SPORT and I had fallen on the floor. No one was listening and I finally just yelled “GET IN THE CAR NOW”. I stepped away to recoup and apologized to my kids and the enemy immediately started feeding me lies. “Good moms don’t yell at their kids.” “Your anger is still out of control. It’s been years and you still haven’t surrender that yet?” etc. I spiral and start attacking myself. “I am a terrible homemaker. I am a terrible wife. I am a terrible mom. I have no business being a leader. I should just quit yelling. What kind of Christian am I that I can’t kick my response to anger? Quit sitting when things need to be done, you should just get up an and do it. Lazy…etc”.

Woah.

That’s not Jesus.

You will know things by their fruits. This has fruits of death and shame and defeat.

Conviction brings life and repentance and change, condemnation brings death and isolation and guilt and shame. I have been convicted to look at my life and evaluate my motives, but I was spiraling fast.

The enemy is real.

I stopped my thoughts and spoke truth over them. I prayed. Hard. I rebuked the enemy. I worshipped. Suddenly, I felt peace. I plugged things in to what is true, just, noble, excellent…etc. See Philippians 4:8 again. I did this until I could see things for what they really are. I sat down and did my study for the day and then sent encouragement to my husband. I am praying for relief. I am praying for God’s provision and favor. I am praying for miracles. I am praying for peace and joy.

The lion has no room in my life…

Under The Sun.