I was talking with a volunteer today and it made me pause and think about people. They are some of the best and worst parts about life. People are hard. And messy. People are broken and sinful and fickle. I am “people” too. We walk this earth feeling entitled and selfish, always angry when things don’t go our way or when we perceive an injustice has happened against us. We get loud. We get ugly… Just to prove our point or try to sway others to take our side or understand. We want to be right. We are cutting people off in traffic because they are in our way. We are screaming at the other driver (like they can hear us) because they are riding our bumpers because “it’s not my fault you’re in a hurry”. We want more. We are called consumers for a reason. Loving people is sacrificial and it takes time and money and emotional space and social battery… and patience and gentleness. It can be exhausting.

I say it all of the time. People in life all want four basic things. Are you ready?

1. To be seen
2. To be heard
3. To be known
4. To be loved

We have been convinced that easier means better and that people aren’t worth it. They call our walls, boundaries (real boundaries are healthy but that’s not what most people have). We celebrate competition and high social status… then we go cry in our closets as we carry the heaviness of life alone. While the silence becomes deafening. We are convinced that our problems are too much for other people yet, somehow, too little for God. The world thinks that peace must look like a lack of struggles. Like smooth sailing on a Sunday morning. Like pretty make up and Sunday bests. We look for more to take in and pull away from people in an effort to fill the empty. Then when we do find people, they hurt us (because people are sinful and messy) so we let them have it and leave. Faces become one messy picture in the crowd. One more person in the chairs next to us. One big blob.

What if we stopped and saw people for what they are?

As I realize that my husband and I are now officially struggling with infertility, it makes me pause and see people a little differently. We’ve become numb to how miraculous it is that everything had to go exactly right for you and I to be here. Each person is the result of countless intricate processes working together. The smallest change could have given a very different outcome. People are not just faces in a crowd or a body in the chair next to you. They are miracles. Intentional lives that came to be against incredible odds. Life is so precious and complicated and valuable. It makes you realize how fast of a life we live where we don’t ever actually invest into the people around us. When you stop and realize that your life isn’t actually all about you and all for you, it becomes easier to love others. To offer grace. To be available. To be patient. To be selfless. When you see people as the miracle that they are, you being to slow down and find beauty in them. Even in their messes. Infertility makes you soften your heart and see the person.

When you recognize how precious a human life is, it becomes easier to see the sacrifice as meaningful offerings. People become worth it.

Jesus came to be a servant. He paid the ultimate sacrifice. He did it all for me. If I am called to bear the image of Christ, I must value people like He did.

I do think some of how we see people is a reflection of how we see ourselves. I mean, we are called to love our neighbor as ourselves but if we don’t love ourselves, it becomes easier to love others the same way. I mean. I have a problem of loving others better than I love myself but that’s a blog post for a different day. Do you realize how miraculous you are?

Everyone matters. Everyone is precious…

Under The Sun.